For over nine years I worked two part time jobs, just barely making ends meet. One of these jobs I had been working at for roughly half my life. It was this job I recently quit. It was really a dead end job that barley paid more than minimum wage and didn't help my self esteem at all. Why did I stay so long? Sometimes you get comfortable in a place and it’s easier to stay than to move on to something else, even though it might be for the better. What finally changed? I did. My courage and confidence grew enough to walk away and not be afraid of what would happen in new territories. My sense of self worth made me realize that I deserve better than mediocrity. I am still at my other job, now my only one, and on a path I should have set foot on years ago and doing better than I have ever done, learning many lessons. Finally getting outside of my comfort zone has brought me the knowledge that I can achieve what I want with patience and perseverance, my potential for growth is enormous, and no one is responsible for me or my happiness except for me. My life is more in balance with who I really am and continue to become. At the old job I let the negativity of that place get to me and gnaw at my essence, I was depressed and stressed out all the time, I learned that you really do have to be careful with who you surround yourself with and be aware of how the moods of others can affect you.

I crawled out of that place I was in and now see things much more differently. This change in perspective helped when an ex-girlfriend who had hurt me badly years before came back into my life right after I quit the second job. She kept telling me she just wanted to be friends but I could tell she really wanted more. I did talk with her for a couple of weeks but when I told her I didn't think it was a good idea to keep in touch she snapped on me and I could tell she was still the same person as before. As they say in Germany, ‘auf wiedersehen hundin!’

As much progress as I am making though, I do have setbacks occasionally, including taking my truck into the shop to have the motor replaced.

 I will be going car-less while this is taking place, but when I get it back…

Next time- working on my debt and the further adventures of not having an automobile.