It is now officially autumn, The leaves are slowly starting to change and the temperature has become a bit less oppressive here in northern California. In the past, this day has been celebrated for the harvest time, a time when all the work put in before comes to fruition. On a personal level this year I see the autumnal equinox as a spiritual thanksgiving. I give thanks to all my friends that have encouraged me to grow and push myself, that have stood by me when things have gotten tough and reveled with me when things were great. I look back at my own ‘harvest’ and am grateful that the seeds I have sown grew into something bountiful.

     My grandmother is currently in a nursing home and it looks like she may be staying  there, so I will have a lot to figure out over the next few weeks. It has been frustrating. Luckily, besides my great group of friends, I have outlets to deal with the stress. Namely cycling and running. I ran the Run For Courage this Saturday and exceeded my goal of low 9 minute miles. I finished the 9.8 mile run with 8:38 miles and a total time of a little over one hour and twenty five minutes. Side note: Run For Courage announced this year that they are changing their organization's name to Break Free, and they will still be combating human trafficking. In case you are wondering why they chose to have a 9.8 mile run this year instead of an even 10, it's because human trafficking activities last year generated $9.8 billion dollars. Back to the run: I finished 44th out of 178 runners. It was an amazing experience. As I neared the finish line someone behind me yelled ‘last push’ and I kicked it into high gear, doing an all out sprint.

     I rediscovered the wonders of Spam this week. Not junk email, but the food. I listened to a podcast about the history of Spam and realized I hadn’t had any in probably about two decades. I wondered if it was as terrible as I remembered it. So I did what anyone would do. I went out and bought a can. And you know what? It wasn’t bad. It’s made to be eaten hot or cold and troops during world war two pretty much survived on this stuff. I may even bring it on my next overnight trip.

                                                                       Sign me up!

     After several months I finally got to see the Commander a couple of days ago. We had burgers at Toby Keith’s, which turns out is a redneck version of Hooters. The food was decent though, surprisingly so actually. She has been kicking ass at work, stopping scumbags and being generally awesome. That’s the great thing about the Commander, she’s an amazing friend and she’s not afraid to do what has to be done. I am so proud to call her one of my best friends.

Until next time dear readers, remember

     The apartment is quiet. Almost too quiet. After several years of helping take care of my grandmother I have become used to her needing help in the middle of the night, her listening to the television too loud. She recently fell again, and after a brief stay in the hospital was transferred to a nursing home. She will be there for almost two weeks, at least. The doctors say she only has six more months to live. How am I dealing with this? If you go by the Kubler-Ross model, I am currently in stage 2: anger. I am angry that she didn't listen to me. The time I told her not to trust her daughter and granddaughter when they said they would start helping her if only they had her car. Or when they told her they would sell the car and use the money to get something that was better, then put the car in their name even though they didn't pay for it. Or when I told her she should get up and walk around more. But especially this last time when I told her she needed to go for a check up and again didn't listen.

      And here I am stuck with the mess she left. All the things she has accumulated that are in boxes she hasn't opened in years that she refuses to get rid of. Piles of envelops she doesn't need but refuses to throw away because she thinks she has to keep them.  Even phone books she believes may actually come in useful. She may come back to the apartment, but I have to face the reality that sooner or later, the quiet that has sunk in will be permanent.

Waste of trees

    It’s been a generally tough week emotionally for me. Besides the stuff with my grandmother, there was one day when my self confidence went in the toilet. I just felt generally unwanted and like everyone else was doing so much better than me. I thought to myself, ‘I know I am not the only one with problems, but I am the only one with MY problems’. After wallowing in my self doubt for a while I pulled my head out of  my ass and realized that I don’t have as much as some, but I still have more than others. I have to stay positive, because I realize that the next few months are going to be tough for me, I won’t let myself be beaten down, especially by myself.

     On a lighter topic, I have continued to ramp up my running this month. The Hokas I bought are working really well for me. I am definitely becoming a convert to the maximalist running shoe movement. No more minimalist shoes for me! I have run in minimalist shoes before, I even ran my first marathon in a pair, but for me, I’ll deal with a few more ounces if it means more cushioning. I ran 10.6 miles the other day, the farthest I've run in several months, and the Hokas were comfortable the whole time. It was a bit of a challenging run though. It was hot, I peed in someone’s bushes because there was no bathroom around and I ran out of water so took some out of a random hose. The water was way too hot and tasted like rubber but I had to stay hydrated. Yesterday I went for two runs. Both a little over 5K, finishing the day with 6.8 miles.

The Hoka One One Clifton

     Saturday night I lay in bed, about to sleep, when a deep rumbling bass jolted me wide awake. A late summer thunder storm. For the next hour and a half I was outside marveling at it. The amazing strikes of lightening illuminating the sky, followed by the rolls of thunder. At one point I heard a pop and felt a sizzle of electricity about fifty feet away, so close that the thunder was instantaneous with the lightening strike. I covered my ears but it was still able to put a hurt in my ear drums. Car alarms went off all over the neighborhood. The rain started shortly after and I sat on the sidewalk, letting the warm drops pelt me. I thought to myself, ‘This is why I go on. When things are tough, and seem too difficult, this is why I don’t give up. Moments like this.’

Until next time my persevering readers, when things, and even life itself, become seemingly too difficult, remember,

      As many of you know I had my birthday a couple of weeks ago, but this last week was birthday: the sequel! I got to see a friend I haven’t seen since before my birthday. They gave me a gift card for the movies, the Guardians of the Galaxy soundtrack, the biggest container of Ovaltine that's made, and one of the best presents of all, spending time with someone really awesome!  We went to the movies and saw Lucy, which was different than I was expecting and still has me questioning what I watched.

     I recently listened to Escape, you know, the pina colada song. I never realized that I hadn't truly listened to the song lyrics before. Go ahead, take a quick break and indulge yourself, give it a listen. Now if you paid attention, like I finally did, you realize there is an incredible message to this song. The guy is tired of his girlfriend, feeling that their relationship is worn out. One night while he’s lying next to her in bed he’s reading the personal ads in the newspaper (remember this is a song from the 70’s), when he sees one that catches his attention. If you listened to the song, you know what the ad says. Feeling that he has to meet this person, he replies, stating he wants to meet her the next day at a bar. After he arrives, in walks his dream girl who just happens to be…HIS GIRLFRIEND!!! The two had more in common than they knew but neither one realized it because they were so caught up in themselves that they didn't see what was right in front of them. Something I think a lot of us do, even if we don’t admit it. So before you go looking for something you think you don’t have, take a look around you first. You never know what you may discover.  And, fun fact, it was the last U.S. number one song of the 70s.

     I am slowly making progress with my fiendish credit card debt. I have come to think of it as a boss in a game. Every dollar I pay off is a hit point, and for every thousand hit points I gain a level. I have just achieved level 2! Only 14 more levels and I will slay the juggernaut! Obviously I have a long way to go before this quest is finished, and I will have to be patient and vigilant, but I will fight the beast until my last!

     Summer is coming to an end, though here in northern California things are still hot. I've been taking advantage of the weather as much as possible. I got another rafting trip in, celebrating the end of the season. We found a paddle, lost a paddle, someone fell out, we had higher than normal water and hit Hospital Bar right down the middle!

                                                       Whitewater Twister anyone?

     I got some new running shoes, Hoka One One, still trying them out, though initial impressions are pretty good. Very light and cushy. I should have them broken in by the time I do the Run For Courage on the 27th. If you’re not familiar with this run, I recommend checking it out. It’s organized by a great non-profit that works to put an end to human trafficking. I’m also working on my mountain bike skills, pushing myself so I can ride trails more technical than I am used to.

     Until next time my insightful readers,

Most of this last week was just more of the usual for me, but what a wonderful sort of usual it is. Nerding out on some of my favorite television shows like Teen wolf and Doctor Who. I haven’t heard too much about what people think of the new Doctor but I'm liking him. That may be because he reminds me of two of my favorite doctors, the forth and sixth.

Of course, this week being more of the usual also found me riding my bicycles. Mostly commuting to work and back but I also got in a trail ride. It always amazes me the sights I see. Deer, egrets perched in trees, the full moon looming in the still dark early morning sky. I always try to keep hold on the ‘usual’ wonders around me and never take them for granted. These moments that make up our lives are really all we have in the end, so why not experience them to the fullest and truly enjoy them? To me, my bicycles provide a way of doing just that and seeing the world as I never would from, say, a motor vehicle. And they cost a lot less to operate, another plus since I am still whittling down my massive, to me, debt.

Sunday was the high light of my week. It started out as kind of a bummer since the rafting trip I had planned for that day got canceled due to my friend having some car problems. I decided to go kayaking though, to at least get my whitewater fix. The new plan was to paddle from Coloma to Greenwood creek, a relatively short 5.5 mile class two stretch of the river. The water was pretty low when I put in, but I figured, what the heck. It would give me a chance to work on my maneuvering skills. I took a few channels I never had been down before, taking my time and exploring. I even hung out at  Barking Dog for a bit, watching a couple rafts surfing the hole and trying it myself.  My prowess was really put to the test as I went through Highway rapid. Rocks that were normally underwater were now two feet above. I slipped my way through whatever openings I could find and  navigated the rocky labyrinth to gain access to the takeout.  As I pulled up I struck up a conversation with some people just putting in.  One thing led to another and before I knew it I was rafting the Gorge with them. I had an amazing time, they were some pretty awesome people and funny as hell! We ran Bouncing Rock backwards, spun around and around in the Lower Haystacks and one of the guys rode the front of the raft through Hospital Bar. That is why I love the river, you never know what is going to happen, especially if you open yourself up to possibilities. Wait…did the river just teach another lesson? Open yourself to the possibilities before you and see what happens! Well, that and

Until next time my fine readers, remember

         I am now another year older. My birthday was just a few days ago, and to celebrate I have had a week of amazing and epic adventures. I started out my actual birthday with a great 5K trail run. I later met up with good friends I don’t get to see very often for a great burger at Dad’s Kitchen in Fair Oaks. Definitely one of the better burgers I have eaten, it had blue cheese and bacon baked into the patty. The fries were delicious as well. I highly recommend checking this place out. I finished the day seeing some of the greatest action heroes of the 80’s making things explode in Expendables 3.

     I somehow managed to get all three days of Labor Day weekend off so I decided to make every day full of  exploits.

    Day 1: R2ing in the Bold Venture through the Gorge on the South Fork of the American River. This was something I had been wanting to do for awhile and I was not disappointed. The light weight of just two people in the raft had us practically dancing on top of all the waves. We spotted a deer along the shore at one point and a horse tried to splash us near Gorilla Rock. At Hospital Bar we stopped to watch another R2 boat go through. Just when it looked like they had it, they flipped. We paddled on and got off the water early enough for me to finish up the day with a short mountain bike ride.

Day 2: I returned to the El Dorado trail to explore the part I hadn’t been on before. I rode from Shingle Springs to Camino. I followed the path along single track, which took me to some paved sections in Placerville, eventually turning back into dirt trail. One of the most amazing parts of this trail is the bridge over Weber Creek. Halfway over the bridge there are dozens of padlocks engraved with the names of couples, locked on the bridge’s fencing.  I rode until I could literally ride no farther. I was blocked by a chain link fence and a wall of blackberry bushes. I turned around and ate up the miles, making the return trip in less than half the time it took me to climb to the eastern terminus. On the way back an unseen drop caused a pedal bite but I had so much dirt on my legs it seemed to clot up the wound. This trail is quickly becoming a favorite and I look forward to getting to know it better.

Day 3: Back to the South Fork. 21.5 miles. The ‘full river’ run. We put in just above the Chili Bar hole and took out at the Salmon Falls parking lot, taking advantage of  Folsom Lake’s low level to raft rapids that usually aren’t there. The day started out with me falling out in Meatgrinder, my third time swimming this rapid. This was the second worst swim I have ever had. I hit my back on a rock, lost my bandana, sunglasses and guide paddle. I stayed calm, even when a hydraulic kept me stuck in the same spot for ten seconds before allowing me to escape. After getting to safety and assessing my wounds we were back on the water. Within five minutes we recovered my paddle. I was overjoyed to have it back, even though it also received wounds similar to mine. We popped wheelies at several rapids and one of my friends finally got to go through the swimmer’s rapid she has been dreaming about going through, hitting every wave. We had an incredibly smooth run through Bouncing Rock, and almost flipped the Bold Venture at Hospital Bar. We held on and hoped for the best and made it through. Another lesson learned from the river when things get rough.

     Until next time my venturesome readers,